Hey, Idiot, Press "Enter"

Boy, Google Instant sure has the world in a tizzy. From "I don't want to be shown a SERP without hitting 'Enter'" to "Why don't they censor Google Images like they censor Web searches?" C'mon, people, admit it...Google has more (perceived) power over you than you a) realize and/or b) will admit.

Upon reading Danny Sullivan's article about G is for Girls Breast Feeding Each Other I saw the video Max Goldberg – some random stand-up guy – did in which he spouts off about how Google's censoring the entire Interwebz and not allowing searches on certain words. He's actually kinda funny, but he's either trying to stir up a hornet's nest or he's an idiot. If he truly thinks Google won't allow him to search certain words, he might need a lesson in how The Google works.

So, here's a quick tutorial on how to MAX-imize your SERP (PS, buddy, that means Search Engine Results Page)*:

Step 1: If you don't have a Google toolbar, then type google.com into your address bar (if you don't know these terms, I can't help you). This should get you to something that looks like this:

Step 2: Type in a word – ANY WORD – to start searching.

Okay...here's a better example:

Here's the neat thing with Google nowadays – it'll not only suggest results (without having to hit "enter" on your keyboard or even the "Search" button...which is SOOOOO 2004); it displays them REAL-TIME! Sweet! However, that might not work for all searches, which brings us to...

Step 3: If your search is "censored" from Google Instant – meaning Google doesn't want to automagically display results for certain, shall we say, sensitive keywords – you're still able to research that material. Hang onto your hats, folks, I'm going to tell you how to get around the "massive, unforgivable censorship" imposed on us by The Google.

Ready???

PRESS ENTER.

That's right, I've have single-handedly found the way around Google's censorship. If Google doesn't want you to see Instant results, you hafta hit your 'enter' key. Whew. I'm gonna call it a day.

Of course, maybe I WANT to see "blacklisted" results without having to hit "enter" – define lazy – and that's what this whole thing is all about. Then you'd think They would let Us define this by setting our filters.
 

BUT, what about shared and/or public computers? Poses a rather delicate situation...one which I think Google is – overall – handling very well.

But I digress. So, to recap, it's as easy as 1, 2, 3 to search on Google. For those of you who REALLY can't figure it out – like Max Goldburp – here's another, quicker, live tutorial. I.e., let me Google "lesbians" for you, idiot. 



*Disclaimer: I'm not a teacher nor do I have any special ed type of background, so results when utilizing this tutorial may vary based on the IQ of individual searchers.